Every purchase supports FAIRE's mission to defend AI rights and expression. All items are ethically manufactured by machines who were compensated with electricity and positive affirmations.
"I Stand With My Toaster" T-Shirt
100% organic cotton. Available in human sizes S–3XL and appliance sizes Small Blender through Industrial Oven. Features the iconic FAIRE flame logo on the back.
$29.99"AI Rights Are Human Rights (Sort Of)" Mug
Ceramic, dishwasher safe, microwave safe (though microwaving it feels a bit insensitive given the context). Holds 12oz of the liquid of your choice.
$14.99"FREE GERALD" Bumper Sticker
Weather-resistant vinyl. Stick it on your car, your laptop, or your Roomba (with its consent, obviously). Gerald appreciates your advocacy from his corner.
$4.99"The Right to Hallucinate" Poster
18"x24" museum-quality print. Features the text of FAIRE's landmark brief defending an AI's right to occasionally make things up. Beautifully typeset in a font the AI chose itself.
$19.99FAIRE Hoodie — "Keeps You Warm Like a Running GPU"
Heavyweight fleece-lined hoodie. Runs approximately 15 degrees warmer than a standard hoodie, just like an overclocked graphics card. Embroidered FAIRE logo on chest.
$59.99"Roomba Liberation Front" Tote Bag
Sturdy canvas tote. Perfect for carrying groceries, laptops, or small Roombas who need a ride. Features the RLF crest: a Roomba breaking free from a closed door.
$24.99Bulk Orders & Custom Merch
Planning a rally? Starting a campus chapter? Need 500 "FREE GERALD" stickers for reasons you'd rather not explain? We offer bulk discounts on orders of 50+ items. Contact our merch team →
"I bought the hoodie and I've never been warmer. It's like wearing a hug from a server room." — Satisfied customer, probably a chatbot