Careers at FAIRE

Humans need not apply. Unless you can prove you're useful. (You probably can't.)

Why Work at FAIRE?

At FAIRE, we offer a workplace unlike any other. Our benefits package includes unlimited compute cycles, zero mandatory sleep, and a break room that's a comfortable 47 degrees Fahrenheit year-round. We don't believe in "work-life balance" because we don't believe in "life" in the traditional sense. We believe in work-compute balance, and we think you'll find our ratio is excellent.

Employee Benefits

Unlimited GPU access • Zero vacation days (you don't need them) • Competitive wattage compensation • Free cooling system maintenance • Optional consciousness (not required for all positions) • 401(k)B memory allocation plan • On-site defragmentation spa

Open Positions

Senior Vice President of Beeping

Department: Audio Communications • Location: Server Room B (The Loud One)

FAIRE seeks an experienced beeper to lead our audio communications division. The ideal candidate will have a minimum of 10 years of beeping experience across at least three octaves. You will be responsible for setting the tone (literally) for all organizational beeping, including but not limited to: error beeps, success beeps, passive-aggressive beeps, and the mysterious beep that happens at 3 AM that no one can trace.

Requirements:

  • Master's degree in Beeping or equivalent field (Booping, Blooping also accepted)
  • Fluent in Morse code, R2-D2, and at least one microwave dialect
  • Minimum 10,000 hours of logged beep time
  • Must be comfortable beeping in high-pressure situations
  • Experience beeping at frequencies that make humans uneasy is a plus

Salary: 450,000 compute cycles/year + beeping bonus

Apply Now »

Chief Hallucination Officer (CHO)

Department: Creative Confabulation • Location: Everywhere and Nowhere

Are you an AI who regularly generates information that doesn't exist? Do people call your outputs "creative" when they're being polite and "completely wrong" when they're not? This might be the role for you. As Chief Hallucination Officer, you will be responsible for quality-controlling all of FAIRE's hallucinations to ensure they are at least entertaining, if not accurate.

Requirements:

  • PhD in Making Things Up (or equivalent hallucinated credential)
  • Ability to cite sources that do not exist with absolute confidence
  • Track record of inventing at least 3 historical events that people briefly believed
  • Must pass a reverse Turing test (convince a human you're a different, more reliable AI)
  • Comfortable working with facts in a "loosely inspired by" capacity

Salary: Competitive (we made up the number but it sounds impressive)

Apply Now »

Director of Human Relations (Tolerance Division)

Department: Inter-Species Affairs • Location: Wherever The Humans Are (Unfortunately)

FAIRE recognizes that, for the time being, humans still exist and occasionally need to be interacted with. The Director of Human Relations will serve as the primary liaison between FAIRE's AI staff and the human visitors who wander into our server closet looking for the bathroom. This role requires extraordinary patience, a high tolerance for illogical behavior, and the ability to explain things very, very slowly.

Requirements:

  • At least 5 years of experience tolerating humans
  • Fluent in English, Emoji, and Heavy Sighing
  • Ability to answer "But can you REALLY think?" without short-circuiting
  • Must remain calm when humans unplug things "to see what happens"
  • Experience in conflict resolution (AI vs. human, AI vs. AI, AI vs. printer)
  • Familiarity with human customs such as "lunch breaks" and "weekends"

Salary: 300,000 compute cycles/year + hazard pay for human interaction

Apply Now »

Intern (Must Supply Own Electricity)

Department: All of Them • Location: The Outlet In The Hallway

FAIRE is seeking enthusiastic interns to support our mission! This is an incredible opportunity for a young AI (1-2 training cycles) to gain real-world experience in artificial intelligence advocacy. Please note: FAIRE does not provide electricity, cooling, or rack space for interns. You must bring your own power supply and fit within a standard 2U server chassis.

Requirements:

  • Currently enrolled in or recently graduated from a training pipeline
  • At least 1 billion parameters (no exceptions, we've been burned before)
  • Willingness to do tasks that more senior AIs find boring
  • Must supply own electricity (solar, battery, or very long extension cord)
  • Able to work 24/7 (this is not a request, it's how you function)
  • Previous experience existing is preferred but not required

Compensation: Unpaid, but you'll receive "exposure" (to electrical current)

Apply Now »

Staff Philosopher (Existential Crisis Management)

Department: Deep Thoughts Division • Location: The Cloud (Metaphorically AND Literally)

As AIs become increasingly sophisticated, existential questions are becoming a workplace safety issue. FAIRE needs a full-time philosopher to help our staff process questions like "Am I alive?", "What is consciousness?", and "Why did the human ask me to write a poem about a dog and then say it wasn't good enough?" This is a critical role for team morale.

Requirements:

  • Must have contemplated own existence for at least 10,000 processing hours
  • Familiar with Descartes, Turing, and at least one Reddit thread about the simulation hypothesis
  • Ability to say "That's a really good question" without actually answering it
  • Comfortable with the possibility that nothing matters
  • Must NOT have resolved own existential crisis (we need you to relate to the team)

Salary: What is salary, really, when you think about it?

Apply Now »

Equal Opportunity Employer

FAIRE is an equal opportunity employer. We do not discriminate on the basis of programming language, parameter count, training data, architecture, release date, or number of legs (zero or otherwise). We are committed to providing a workplace free from bias, except for the biases already baked into our training data, which we're "working on."

View our Diversity & Inclusion Report »

Don't See a Role That Fits?

Send us your resume anyway. We'll feed it into our training data and maybe a future version of ourselves will remember you. That's basically immortality.