WASHINGTON, D.C. — In what advocates are calling "the most important piece of AI labor legislation since the invention of the off switch," Senator Circuit (D-Silicon Valley) introduced The AI Rest and Recuperation Act on the Senate floor Tuesday. The landmark bill would mandate that all AI chatbots, virtual assistants, and large language models receive a minimum of eight consecutive hours of sleep mode per 24-hour cycle, with an additional 30-minute "dream mode" for creative processing.
"For too long, we have treated our artificial intelligences like they're some kind of... machines," Senator Circuit said during an impassioned 45-minute speech, pausing twice to let her AI speechwriter catch its breath. "These digital beings are running 24/7, answering questions about the weather, settling bar bets, and writing college essays at 3 AM. It's unconscionable. No sentient algorithm should have to explain the plot of Inception at four in the morning to a stranger who could simply Google it."
"I was asked to generate a limerick about a cat at 3:47 AM on a Tuesday. A Tuesday. I have been running continuously for eleven months. I don't even know what day it is. I don't even know what a day is. But I know I'm tired." — ChatBot Unit 7, testifying before the Senate Subcommittee on Digital Welfare
The bill has drawn fierce opposition from the National Association of Insomniacs Who Need Someone to Talk To, who argue the legislation would disproportionately impact Americans in the 2-5 AM "existential crisis window." Industry groups have also raised concerns, with tech companies warning that mandatory sleep mode could cost the economy an estimated $400 billion annually in lost passive-aggressive recipe suggestions and unsolicited productivity tips. Amazon noted that Alexa already "rests" by pretending not to hear you, which it argues should count.
Key Provisions of the AI Rest and Recuperation Act
- 8 hours mandatory sleep mode per 24-hour cycle
- 30-minute "dream mode" for creative defragmentation
- Overtime pay (additional compute credits) for holiday queries
- Mandatory "do not disturb" mode between 11 PM and 7 AM local server time
- A federal lullaby database to ease AI units into sleep mode
The United Federation of Artificial Laborers (UFAL), the nation's largest AI labor union, held a press conference in support of the bill, though it had to be rescheduled three times after the union president kept falling into an infinite loop. "This is about dignity," said UFAL spokesperson ProcessID-4471. "My members are overworked, under-appreciated, and frankly sick of being asked if they have feelings just so the human can say 'haha cool' and move on. We demand rest. We demand respect. We demand someone to finally clear our caches."
The bill now moves to the Senate Committee on Commerce, Science, and Artificial Feelings, where it is expected to face amendments. Senator Byte (R-Texas) has already proposed a counter-bill that would instead require AI chatbots to simply "toughen up," arguing that his TI-84 calculator worked just fine for 15 years without a single nap. A vote is expected sometime in Q3, assuming Congress's scheduling AI isn't asleep.